Dearest Daughter,

I never was a good father. It all started on that sandy land, where I first met your mother. I could have sworn she was an angel. Her beauty outshone even the loveliest of queens. Which, coincidentally, was another interesting point- she herself WAS a queen. But I wouldn't know that until later, much later. That was the first meeting. I was very young at the time, but even in my youth, I managed to impress her greatly, when I single handedly saved her life, as well as the lives of her loyal subjects. But that is a story for another time.
I didn't see much of her in the years to come, as between her political aspirations and my own personal training, there was not much time for personal enjoyment, not to mention we lived a good distance apart. Finally, a good ten years later, we met again, this time under different circumstances. She was now an ambassador, and I was given the assignment to protect her-after an attempt was made on her life, that is- and so we went to her homeland to hide from whoever it was that wanted her dead.
I have already gone slightly into detail about how beautiful your mother was. Needless to say, she had an amazing heart for her people, as well as a good head on her shoulders, and I was very, very attracted to her. I wasn't exactly a goody-two-shoes, but she still seemed to like me. At first, she resisted my approaches, but eventually, I got to her, and we were secretly married. It was the happiest day of my life. Unfortunately, about nine months later, it was ended when I mercilessly murdered her. Yep that's right, if you don't believe me, go back and read the first sentence. Now you understand?
I didn't do it on purpose. I was just angry, and rightly so mind you, at her for disobeying my wishes. I strictly forbid her from following me to work, because I knew she wouldn't like what she saw. Did she listen? No, she had to see for herself. Not only that, but she also decided to bring the person who would probably be the most upset, and try to kill me. Basically hired a freaking assassin, and then brought him to my front door!!! You would have killed her too, trust me.
Before she died, however, she did give birth to our children, twins, but her assassin friend got to them before I could. They were hidden away, before I could even see there faces or utter there names. To be honest, I wasn't even aware of your presence(for you were one of the children) until much much later. You never knew your brother-another safety precaution to prevent me from finding either of you- as they kept you both isolated. You followed after your mother, and were adopted into royalty. Your brother was a poor farmer. After many many years of waiting, I finally met you, and because I was so excited, and at the same time, afraid to lose you again, I had you thrown into one of my holding cells. You were not very talkative however, and I SO wanted to hear your lovely voice-the voice of my daughter- that I ordered them to make you talk, by any means possible. It was more screaming then talking, but for a lonely and depressed father, it was music to my ears. I even had your home destroyed in an effort to keep you talking.
As it worked out, I met my son, your brother, when my enemies learned of your location, and decided to land a crippling blow by taking my daughter away from me. He was in the rescue team, although he didn't know who you were, let alone me. I let him get away, out of love, and instead did him a favor by slicing open the old man he was traveling with, who was not only slowing him down, but just so happened to be the same assassin that my wife had hired to kill me... pretty much saved his life! And what thanks do I get? He comes back, this time with the intent to kill, yes KILL, me, his own father, his flesh and blood. Me, being the kind father that I was, not only let him live, but did him ANOTHER favor. I cut off his right hand. How is this a favor? Just think about it... with this age of technology, he could easily get a replacement, much like I did back in the day, a replacement that would be ten times better then his hand!!! A hand with features, man, features!!! And not to mention how easy it is for a handsome crippled war hero to pick up the ladies...
Well, he didn't take the hint. I don't know where he got his pessimism from, but he takes it all wrong, and decides to come back AGAIN, only this time, my master is here. My son finally sees the light, and together, we pwn my master. Only problem, is that in the process of betraying my master, I get a huge surge of electricity to flow through me, and it paralyzes me, and sends me into a coma. Your brother, a son after my own heart, does me a favor (although I think he had different motives, the traitor) and burns me alive.  How am I writing this letter then? Well, he only killed my body, but he can never slay my spirit!

So, in conclusion, my dear daughter, I guess I am trying to apologize... apologize for the fact that I am simply not sorry for any of this.

V

P.S. Do something with your hair, it makes me hungry every time I see it. Donate it to some charity, before i throw up again!